Facing the future

I've come up with an idea that could kiss facial wrinkles goodbye. It's revolutionary and it involves food.

We already know there are certain food types that encourage weight gain in particular parts of the body: delicious, creamy buns and cakes send calories to the bum; easy-drinking, affable, effervescent beer goes to the gut; and for women, all the good things left in life such as chocolate, well - traces of their ingestion attach themselves to the thighs.

As food types partial to particular bits of bodies have already been invented, I'm wondering why someone doesn't develop a food that likes to dwell above the throat? It would be great if it was a delicious as well as a clever food, that once ingested, defies gravity and targets the hosts' visage, giving a healthy, full and happy countenance.

I challenge a clever company such as Apple to take on the task - a company that seems to excel in a little bit of magic with everything they do. They could call it the iFace. Everything with an i and an apple seems to do really well these days. And you know what they say - an apple a day keeps the surgeon away.